Why did the fish fly It didn't

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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