- Anti Joke

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

a person who will soon die of beeties

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

that wall over there ->

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.