Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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Women's rights.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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