Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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How did the Muslim girl get pregnant? She was brutally raped on the streets of Baghdad.

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a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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Why cant Helen Keller driver? She's a woman

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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What fires shots? A gun

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops