What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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42

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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jhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

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Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

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Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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knock knock go away!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops