what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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no

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops