Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A women left the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than stepping on a nail? stepping on the nail and falling on more nails face first.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A kid walks into a bar He gets kicked out

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the white rapper say to the black rapper? i like your work. to which the which the black rapper replied, thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops