There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

Why was the little boy laying on the ground unconscious? because I threw a fridge at him.

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

daughter: Mum why do I have a brother mum: He not your real brother dont worry your adopted :) daughter: :'(

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in an open hole Poor body disposal practice

There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

Have you heard the one about Tony Hawk's brother Mike? Neither has he, considering Tony Hawk only has a brother named Steve.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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