Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

thumb_up thumb_down +2

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

thumb_up thumb_down +2

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

thumb_up thumb_down +2

besides saying "Oh, Yeah" and punching down walls, what does the kool-aid man do? drink cool aid

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

thumb_up thumb_down

What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

thumb_up thumb_down

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops