The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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What do you call a blue colored dog with seven legs, that oinks? not a dog...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Honk if you're Amish!

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what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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one stop shop

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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Cancer. Super Cancer.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. FBI who? The FBI. We have your house surrounded. Pervert.

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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