Where does someone who has lost his arm, has a bleeding head, is mentally ill, has strep throat, and lung cancer go? Too late, they died.

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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haha

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

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Whats more fun that a hooker - her mother

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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