you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

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What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops