What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

Maths.

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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