whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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