Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped six's mother

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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What's round and orangey? An orange.

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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