RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

Q: What did the black guy say to the white guy? A: Nothing, he's a mute.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

a man walks into a bar. He left after he drank two beers. Someone pulled his pants down and he didnt notice. when he got home he realized his pants were gone. He returned to the bar to search, but it was a metal bar, and he was fairly stupid. please dont laugh

There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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