what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

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whats black and doesnt like politics? a black chair

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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