Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

Why did the old man die? He was old.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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