Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happened to the baby seal who went clubbing? He met a nice woman and contracted HIV from her after engaging in unprotected sexual intercourse after taking her to his flat.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What comes after 69... Mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

lil billy wuz killed cuz of hiz relijuz beliefz

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's round and orangey? An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Four men are stranded on a small desert island. The first of them decides to build a raft out of bamboo, but it only has room for one passenger. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he shouted to the men on shore as he left, but a band of pirates killed him in the middle of the ocean. The second castaway was more clever, and built a submarine out of bamboo and sealed it with hides of animals they had killed. He counteracts the buoyant force with sand. In this way, he planned to avoid the pirates by being underwater. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he exclaimed as he sealed the one person sized chamber of his submarine, but not far off shore, he runs out of oxygen and suffocates to death. The third castaway learned from the mistakes of the first two, and in spite of the unpredictability of handcrafted aerial vehicles, he makes a glider. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he shouts from the hill top of the island as he leaps off and glides over the horizon. Though the journey is fraught with peril, he makes it back to civilization and is reunited with his family. It is expensive, but he prepares an expedition back to the island where his fourth comrade remains. It is worthy to note that on this small island, all the means of making shelter had been used up in the construction of the raft, submarine, and glider. The fourth castaway was found dead from exposure to the elements.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the seat next to you? A: Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops