Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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