How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

If you were a pie I'd eat you

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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