Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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Q: Why do sharks live in salt water A: Because if they don't the die from blood loss because their blood-cells swell up and explode in non- salty water.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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