Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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