rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Badabing.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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