Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

thumb_up thumb_down +6

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

thumb_up thumb_down +6

where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +6

True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops