There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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What's 9 + 10 19 AB

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A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

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Two Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes." Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?" The dean says, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard." "That's true, I do have a yard." "I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house." "Yes, I do have a house." "And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family." "Yes, I have a family." "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual." "I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed eater." Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?" Jim says, "I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?" "No." "Then you're gay!"

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so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

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why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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