Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

joe galasso from plainview ny

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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