What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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why couldn't jimmy play on the swings at recess.. Because he's been dead for 5 years

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

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Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

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A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

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why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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