Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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Gustavo Andrade

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

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Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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