Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

A 14 year girl enjoys exploring the sexual regions of her body, whilst having one of her intimate sessions her brother walks into her room. Her brother was a rather sexual 17 year old, who has had sex with several different girls, and is not afraid to try new things. the brother says " get a room to his sister... oh wait" and walks out

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

What did the black man do after the white guy told a racist joke? Laugh

How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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