Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

A blue whale walks into a bar. The bartender says "What can I get for you?" The blue whale says "EEEEEEYYYYYYYOOOOHHHHHMMMMMMM"

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

why is pie good. because it just is.

A bar walks into a man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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