Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

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a dumb blond walks into a hair salon and gets her hair died brown... she is now a dumb brunette

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How many feet are in a yard? It depends how many people are in the yard.

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whos the most unprodutive person ever not hitler her helped over populatin and got rid of the jew they multiply like jews anyways

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You: I have a question Person: Yes You: Do you have an answer?

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

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here's a joke... the american education society

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

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What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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womens rights

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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what is differnt about a boyscout and a jew? the boyscout comes back from camp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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