knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Illumati Confirmed

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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