What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

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Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

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My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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What is green and looks like a blue car? A Green car

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What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops