Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

thumb_up thumb_down +23

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +23

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops