What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

ur mum

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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