Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a lamp?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

thumb_up thumb_down +18

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock, Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops