What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your momma's so dumb, she has below average IQ.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How High is a Chinese man

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

thumb_up thumb_down +17

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops