- Anti Joke

why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

Badabing.

Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

A child walks into a bar. He finds to find his dad passed out in his vomit, the bartender realizes the dad left the kid in the car, and he is arrested. The kid grows up traumatized by the experience, and becomes a substance abuser just like his dad.

Question: how many times a power rangers episode show a power rangets face ANSWER: dont ask me im not that big of a power rangers!

Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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