Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

What did the minority say to the white person? Aboobasashagaboogly. He was uneducated, along with the other minorities in the world.

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Why does Justin Beiber look like a girl? Because he achieved international fame and fortune at a prepubescent age, and has made more money before he turned 18 than most people will in their entire lives.

What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

Have you heard the tale of the black knight on the black horse? Well, the black knight on the black horse rode up to the castle of the king and was stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the ruby from the ruby dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the ruby dragon and the ruby dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your ruby so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and decides to give the black knight on the black horse the ruby (it was a kind dragon). So the black knight on the black horse rides back to the castle and is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the emerald from the emerald dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the emerald dragon and the emerald dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your emerald so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and decides to give the black knight on the black horse the emerald (it was a kind dragon). So the black knight on the black horse rides back to the castle and is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and the emerald from the emerald dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the diamond from the diamond dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the diamond dragon and the diamond dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your diamond so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and says no. So they fight for three days till the black knight on the black horse slays the diamond dragon and rides back to the castle with the diamond. He is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and the emerald from the emerald dragon and the diamond from the diamond dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her, go upstairs and ask her.” So the black knight on the black horse goes upstairs and knocks on the princess’s door and she calls out, “Who goes there?” He replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, will you marry me?” and she said, “No.”

I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

Nero, sure you are okay?

What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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