What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. Imams do not drink alcohol so this joke has a logical flaw.

Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

High enough to know that fucking IQ is a terrible way to measure the total potential of the mind, which is potentially limitless depending on the person`s contact and control over the subconscious state.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

Bob Saget that is all

Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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