- Anti Joke

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

You want to hear a joke? Republican

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

What did the teacher do? He taught.

Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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hey bruno ta quoi ds ta boite a lunch aujourdhui? DU SABLE CRISS DE POVRE!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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