Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? I didn't do it right.

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Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Y couldn't you stop the bowling ball? Because it was going down a hill.

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? About 1 or 2, then the neighbors would phone the police and you would be arrested for infanticide.

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what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

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What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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why was 6 afraid of 9? cause thats just gross.

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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What did Osama bin Laden say when he heard loud gunshots outside his millitary compound? A: We'll never find out

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops