Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

We found a cure for cancer. Death

What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

What did the boy born with cancer get for christmas? ... More cancer

A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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