Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Because he felt like it okay!!! Just let him be!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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