when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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men's rights activists

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Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

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Your mom is so fat she should probably go to her doctor and ask for a prescription of diabetic pills

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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The government

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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My new friend, aka future fuckbuddy asked me what I do for a living. I told her, I write books. She asked me if I had gotten anything published yet. I told her: EXCUSE ME? DID I SAY I WAS A PUBLISHER? She laughed, for some reason... Good enough of an Antichri... Antijoke.

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops