Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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