A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What is worse than getting stung by a wasp? Getting raped by a sexually frustrated bear.

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why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

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Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

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Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

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what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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