Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

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What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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What does a white man say when you slug him in the face with a club. Ow.

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops