We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

knowone loved me why???????????????????????? because they were so damm ugly

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...