Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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How did my grandparents survive the Holocaust? Well for starters, it helps that they weren't Jewish, they didn't live in Europe, and quite frankly, they probably would have supported Hitler because they were right wing pricks.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops